SALES AND MARKETING: The Art of Listening . . . for Success

Sales and Marketing with Bill Doerr

15 Second 'Speed Read'

Business people value a timely response from vendors. But they value an effective response even more. Effective listening - combining both active and empathic listening causes you to be seen as a person of interest and value.

This article explains WHY listening can be a challenge and HOW you can develop the ability to listen effectively, build relationships, invite trust and build revenues.

Listening is a Key Skill and Behavior

Public speaking. Everyone has taken a course in it or knows someone who did.

But, Public listening. Whoa! Where did THAT come from? Not so common, is it!

That's a problem. And, an opportunity . . . for you to develop an extremely important skill and artform: Listening.

Listening . . . taking in information and using it to engage, effectively with another person . . . is a skill-set that is not taught in schools. And yet, success in business depends heavily on your ability to process what people are saying and use it effectively.

Steve Porcaro - The Surgical Sales Coach

I had the pleasure of reconnecting with Steve recently. He's been 'on the circuit' a lot lately. He speaks before numerous networking groups, sharing his wealth of knowledge on various ways to improve revenues in these challenging times. Lately, 'listening' has been a very hot topic with his clients. For a good reason. It's a very valuable skill to possess!

"It's all about sales" (or, is it?)

Steve is a business coach who works exclusively with people who are selling medical equipment and services to physicians and other health care professionals.

"Someone becomes my client because he (or, she) is not getting sales as easily or extensively as he'd like. He's not sure why. And often externalizes the source of the problem citing: "It's the economy" or "My company isn't competititve" or something similar."

In many cases, blame-scaping on an external factor . . . the economy, the company, the product, the marketplace, etc. only serves to take the focus (and, pressure!) off of the one constant in every case . . . the person who's responsible for generating new revenues.

Sellling is Like Surgery

Before becoming a 'surgical sales coach' Steve actually was in surgery. A lot. In the US Navy, he was a surgical technician. After leaving the Navy, he sold medical equipment and services to civilian surgeons. So he knows the reality of both selling and surgery, first-hand.

"In surgery, you prep (prepare) the patient BEFORE surgery". Seems obvious. In an operating room! But in the business world . . . in sales . . . your preparation requires your ability and commitment to listen . . . to process what is being said by someone . . . before selling can begin.

"If you don't listen . . . you can't prepare to sell as effectively as you might like . . . and you learn that when, symptomatically, you lose sales you should have won, they take longer to close than you might like or you end up with a lesser sale when a greater one was well within your grasp."

Why People Aren't Listening

I asked Steve, "OK, why . . . aren't more people in business listening effectively - especially when the consequences of not listening are so serious?" "Good question", he said. "If I had to, I'd have to say either:

1. they don't know how to listen - it is, afterall, a learned skill, not a natural one
2. they're not used to 'slowing down' and 'digesting' the information they receive from a prospect" (the 'Ready, Aim . . . FIRE! syndrome)
3. they haven't considered the consequences that not listening effectively will produce
4. they're in a 'comfort zone' with their current level of success

Once you're receptive to change (Porcaro-speak for 'frustrated beyond all belief') then . . . you are ready to learn how to listen effectively. But, how?

Make 'Bare-handed' Calls!

"You must clear your mind. That way, your focus is on the other person, not you" (I swear, I thought I saw David Carradine there for a moment!) "When you first meet with a prospect for example, I recommend leaving all your brochures, pamphlets, etc. in the car and just seek to answer one simple question . . . "How might I help you, today?" or "What are you hoping I can do for you?" Either one will work!"

This type of question helps you focus on 'getting the top off of the soda bottle'. Unless and until you do that, the bottle's contents . . . the person's hopes, fears, dreams, goals, frustrations, etc. . . . will remain 'locked up' -- unavailable and unable to help anyone.

"It's not easy to do this" says Porcaro. "But it's not impossible, either." Steve believes listening is a learned skill more than a natural ability. "Until you do though, you're focusing more on giving your information to someone, than allowing their information to flow to you".

What's The 'Next Step'?

"Information gained from a focused conversation with someone must lead to a decision". I could imagine the granite rock on which that expression is kept in Steve's brain! Actually, Steve refers to that as the 'Next Step'. "Sometimes, there isn't one. But often there is. And the best one reflects whatever you learned by LISTENING to the other person!"

Everyday we connect with other people. How many of these points-of-contact are producing value . . . for both parties?

Listening effectively . . . actively and empathetically . . . will do much to ensure that you glean something useful from every conversation you have.

Final Thoughts

I asked Steve, "If there's ONE thing you'd like someone to take away from this article, what would it be?". He thought about it and said, "I like what Steven Covey said, "Seek first to understand, then to be understood". There's a sequence there - an orderliness. When I worked with surgeons, their success was always based on proper preparation . . . of the patient as well as themselves and the entire surgical team. Great results are often more reflective of great preparation than anything else. It's no different in business or networking. People. Communication. Every day each of us is exchanging information to create value for ourselves and others. So just remember . . . it all begins with learning how . . . and caring to . . . LISTEN!"

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Steve Porcaro, ACC is the 'Surgical Sales Coach' and founder of 1•4•All Coaching in Windsor, CT. To learn more about Steve and his services you can contact Steve Porcaro, ACC online at: www.14allcoaching.com or by phone at: (860) 243-9757.

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Bill Doerr is CCO of SellMore Marketing. He helps professionals and other service providers to market their problem-solving expertise simply, effectively and affordably.

You can reach him at www.sellmoremarketing.com, or by phone at 860-798-6964.

For more please see Bill's TNNW Bio.

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Published by THE NATIONAL NETWORKER Newsletter. All rights reserved. Subscribe Free - Click HERE.
The National Networker Companies





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SALES AND MARKETING: The Art of Listening . . . for Success

WORKING WITHIN: Empathy A Key Skill

Working Within
with Leanne Hoagland-Smith

Empathy, the ability to acknowledge the feelings of another individual without agreeing with them, is a key skill in networking. Daniel Goelman in his book Working with Emotional Intelligence suggests that individuals with high empathy also have higher EQ (emotional intelligence). High EQ is a desired trait in leadership and in working with others.

This necessary skill of empathy is not isolated, but one that is combined with many other soft skills (people skills) or what I call self -leadership skills. Through this combination both skills are enhanced and truly improve the results.

So what does it take to be empathetic? Here are five behaviors that are necessary, in my opinion, to be able to demonstrate empathy.

Behavior #1 - First, I believe the willingness to have an open mind. This is probably the greatest challenge because of our inherent belief systems. These beliefs cloud our ability to be empathetic because they are in many cases subconscious and are happening without our conscious knowledge. Having an open mind is a behavior because it is demonstrated through our body language.

Behavior #2 - Second, a commitment to leave our own egos at the door. The desire to show that we are “right” as individuals whether it is been there done that or we know better. When we are truly empathetic, the focus is on the other person and not ourselves.

Behavior #3 - Third, active listening or what some now described as purposeful listening is critical. Unfortunately, even though many have engaged in some training and development around how to improve communication skills, active listening is still not at the level it needs to be. How many times do you have to repeat yourself to a fellow employee because he or she is truly not focused on hearing your request? And less us not forget, how many times have you asked someone to repeat something because you were not truly listening?

Behavior #4 - Fourth, follow-up is also part of empathetic behavior. For example, the other day a business owner called who was not a client, but who just wanted someone to listen and provide some insight. Given her state of distress, I invested 30 minutes to listen to what she believed was an overwhelming challenge. The following day I gave her a quick follow-up call to see how she was doing.

Behavior #5 - The final behavior is not confusing empathy with sympathy. When we are sympathetic, we not only understand, but agree to what is happening. This agreement may send the wrong message to the other person. We can be truly empathetic without being sympathetic. The challenge from a behavioral perspective is to make sure our actions (responses) do not create confusion. We do not want to become the "crying towel" for everyone else in the department or organization as that would affect our own productivity. Here is where strong communication skills are required not too mention some effective time management strategies.

Again, the goal of networking is to build mutually beneficial relationships. Networking within requires many skills. Empathy is one critical skill. Future columns will explore others. Leanne Hoagland-Smith author of Be the Red Jacket in a Sea of Gray Suits.

For more information, please visit Leanne's TNNW Bio.


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WORKING WITHIN: Empathy A Key Skill

SOUTH AFRICA: Cell Phones During Meetings - How Serious are You to Build Your Business Relationships?

By Karl Smith
South Africa Bureau Chief

Today I want to talk about a trend in the business environment namely “cell phones during meetings”. I might have missed these during my formal studies or perhaps a business grooming school in South Africa or elsewhere are training business people to be experts in it. If you know of such institution, please let me know. I was having a coffee at a restaurant in Durbanville (Cape Town) after my keynote speech at a business network breakfast. I left the event satisfied that attendees not only learned some vital relationship-building skills but they showed delight in the fact that it was not another eating - and - speech presentation: they were involved and made contacts!

Enjoying a cup of coffee after the delivery of a keynote or workshop is a ritual I follow before moving to my next task. Whilst sipping my coffee, a loudly spoken gentleman - dressed smartly in a very expensive business suit - introduced himself to someone who seemed to be a prospective client. Now you know, nowadays with cell (mobile) phones around - you can hear everything without eavesdropping, because many cell phone users are loud! He interrupted the meeting with his conversation partner at least four times to answer the phone. You may or may not know that active listening with sufficient eye contact and a warm smile, when appropriate, are key ingredients in showing sincere interest in your conversation partner. What I cannot understand is how so many people make contact, secure an appointment and then enter the meeting with his/her cell phone switched on. I understand if one expects an urgent call and you declare this before you start the meeting e.g. “Karl, I value your time but I am keeping my phone switched on because…). And then only for serious matters!

However, one finds these days that some people request meetings with you and then use half of your time to engage in conversations with others on their cell phones. This habit is not restricted to business meetings - just have a look at how many bosses are sitting with their cell phones switched on while they have meetings with their employees. What message do you think are you sending out to your conversation partner? Are you sincerely interested in his/her needs? Are they so unimportant? Do you fear that you next deal may be better? It is nothing less then face-to-face cold calling and then you wonder why people don’t buy you, your products, service or ideas?

John Maxwell in his book, 25 Ways to Win with People, stresses the importance of listening for people’s feeling not just their ideas. Says Peter Drucker, “The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn’t being said.” One should put oneself in a good mental environment for listening says Maxell. If you are aware of a grooming school where they groom business people that it is acceptable business etiquette to enter meetings with cell phones switched on – then please let me know!


Karl Smith is South Africa’s Business Networking & Referral Coach and the owner of ExecuEdge Consulting - a successful consulting and business relationships training company. Visit www.businessnetworkingsouthafrica.co.za to see Karl in action, see what Karl’s clients says, book Karl to speak or to do in-company training, attend a public event, subscribe to his newsletter or to use the free networking resources.

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SOUTH AFRICA: Cell Phones During Meetings - How Serious are You to Build Your Business Relationships?

Strategy Four: Listen Three Times as Much With Purpose: Finding Joint Rhythm & Harmony

Beyond Networking: Being with Ron Sukenick

Ron's section is sponsored by SmallBizAmerica.com

Finding joint rhythm and harmony requires practice, practice, practice AND the ability to adjust your communication style to the needs of your partner. When you listen with purpose you are better able to get to the “heart” of an issue, and make relational changes to get back on the same page. Listening three times as much provides the following opportunities. You get more from the interaction, you affirm the person or persons you are listening to, your understanding of the message is greatly enhanced, and you lay the foundation for increased cooperation and collaboration. Following is an assessment to help shed light on your listening awareness.

Respond to the following statements, and rate yourself below. Give yourself 3 points for always; 2 points for sometimes; 1 point for rarely; and 0 points for never.

I am aware that to listen effectively I must listen with a purpose.

I have trained myself to listen three times as much as I speak.

I listen for understanding
rather than evaluation.

I use clarification to ensure that I am understanding what is being said as the person speaks.

I recognize the importance of my non-verbal expressions communicated to the
speaker.

I am aware of the word, phrases, or behaviors that will likely make me feel defensive.

I wait until the speaker has finished before responding.

People often thank me for listening.

I concentrate on what the speaker is saying even though other things may distract me.

I am able to exercise emotional control when listening, even if I disagree with the message.

I realize that listening purposefully may be the key to understanding.

I listen for ideas and feelings as well as facts.

Score:

16 or less - We suggest that you practice, practice, practice.

17-22 - Spend more time on purposeful listening.

23-29 - Purposeful listening is natural for you.

30+ - You are an exceptional listener!

What are the action steps that will lead your listening forward? For example, sign up for a course on listening. Or, choose a relationship that needs “listening attention” and practice! Whatever your action is, remember to note it in your calendar!

What action steps will you take? Add these steps to your calendar right now.

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Ron Sukenick is the Chief Relationship Officer and founder of the Relationship Strategies Institute, a training and Relationship development company that provides innovative, effective and relevant programs and systems for corporations, organizations, and associations. To learn more about the value of Relationship Development, visit his Web site at www.Ronsukenick.com . You can reach Ron by phone at: 317-216-8210, or by email.

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Strategy Four: Listen Three Times as Much With Purpose: Finding Joint Rhythm & Harmony