Beyond Networking: Being with Ron Sukenick
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Finding joint rhythm and harmony requires practice, practice, practice AND the ability to adjust your communication style to the needs of your partner. When you listen with purpose you are better able to get to the “heart” of an issue, and make relational changes to get back on the same page. Listening three times as much provides the following opportunities. You get more from the interaction, you affirm the person or persons you are listening to, your understanding of the message is greatly enhanced, and you lay the foundation for increased cooperation and collaboration. Following is an assessment to help shed light on your listening awareness.
Respond to the following statements, and rate yourself below. Give yourself 3 points for always; 2 points for sometimes; 1 point for rarely; and 0 points for never.
I am aware that to listen effectively I must listen with a purpose.
I have trained myself to listen three times as much as I speak.
I listen for understanding
rather than evaluation.
I use clarification to ensure that I am understanding what is being said as the person speaks.
I recognize the importance of my non-verbal expressions communicated to the
speaker.
I am aware of the word, phrases, or behaviors that will likely make me feel defensive.
I wait until the speaker has finished before responding.
People often thank me for listening.
I concentrate on what the speaker is saying even though other things may distract me.
I am able to exercise emotional control when listening, even if I disagree with the message.
I realize that listening purposefully may be the key to understanding.
I listen for ideas and feelings as well as facts.
Score:
16 or less - We suggest that you practice, practice, practice.
17-22 - Spend more time on purposeful listening.
23-29 - Purposeful listening is natural for you.
30+ - You are an exceptional listener!
What are the action steps that will lead your listening forward? For example, sign up for a course on listening. Or, choose a relationship that needs “listening attention” and practice! Whatever your action is, remember to note it in your calendar!
What action steps will you take? Add these steps to your calendar right now.
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