BEYOND NETWORKING: BEING: Develop a Relationship Mindset

Beyond Networking: Being with Ron Sukenick

"The most important single discovery of this generation is that we change our conditions by changing our attitude of mind" - William James

A turning point in developing my relationship mindset occurred about thirty years ago. I was on a plane from L.A to N.Y. to visit my parents. It was one of those midnight specials. The plane wasn’t as full as I am sure the airline wished it would have been, and the opportunity to stretch out across the entire row of seats made itself available.

What happened next I believe literally changed my life, or, at least my attitude about life and the power behind developing a relationship building mindset.

On awakening after a few undisturbed hours of restful sleep, I felt something at my head. Grabbing to feel what it was, I picked up this 5x7 black-covered book titled The Master Key System by Charles Haanel. For whatever reason, somebody either accidentally dropped it at my head, or possibly placed it there for me to enjoy for the rest of my life.

Let’s take a moment to examine some of Charles Haanel’s ideas. The book points out that much gathers more is true on every plane of existence, and that loss leading to greater loss is equally true. Our minds are creative, and conditions, environment and all experiences in life are the result of our habitual, or predominant, mental attitude.

Our attitude of mind depends upon what we think. Therefore, the secret of all power, all achievement, and all possibility depends upon our thinking.

This is true because we must “BE” before we can “DO.” And we can “DO” only to the extent which we “ARE.” What we “ARE” depends upon what we think.

Our attitude of mind toward life pretty much determines the experiences we meet. If we expect nothing, we shall have nothing; if we expect much, we shall receive the greater portion.

The important aspect of this strategy is recognizing how our thoughts are getting in the way, and focusing on relationship connecting, rather than spending our energy on negative thoughts about the relationship or the individual, or what is not working. We are able to focus on gathering more.


Ron Sukenick
Business Advisor / Relationship Strategist / Author / Connector
rs@ronsukenick.com
www.ronsukenick.com
317-216-8210
Check out my Radio Podcast’s
http://www.smallbizamerica.com/beyond


Let's get connected on LinkedIn
http://www.linkedin.com/pub/ron-sukenick/0/226/20a


“Certified Human Behavior Consultant”
Nominated 2009 "America's Most Influential Business Connector"


For more information, please visit Ron's TNNW Bio.

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BEYOND NETWORKING: BEING: Develop a Relationship Mindset

BEYOND NETWORKING: BEING: 13 Ways to Create Impact

Beyond Networking: Being with Ron Sukenick

Are you making the most from the contacts you're making?

How often do you go out, meet people, and for whatever reason, nothing happens?

Think about it. Do you consciously plan or map out what you're looking to accomplish?

In most cases, people go out to network with no real goal in mind. They simply do it for the joy of interaction. Now, I’m not putting down the concept of interacting because as you and I know, if it wasn’t for having some fun at it we would never do it. So you make a lot of contacts but the relationship never really goes anywhere.

Did you ever think about why?

And while we can make all the contacts in the world, wouldn’t it be great to know more about how we can convert contacts into purposeful connection? As a way to help you in the process, listed below you’ll find some tips on how to do just that.


13 ways to help you create impact at the point of interaction

1. Contribute – Always share ideas, information and your resources with others.
   


2. Make it a small world – Everyone you meet has something in common with you. Your job is to find out what that is. In helping you to make it a small world, always mention the names of people, places and things. You’ll be amazed on how people will respond when they find that you have experienced something or know someone in common.
   


3. Take interest in others – By investing a little time in research prior to your following up on a contact you made, you’d be amazed at the impact upon your follow-up phone call. Go to any of your favorite search engines and be amazed at what might come up for you to read. Once found, mention to the person you're following up with what you found as you were surfing the net. They will love that you took the time to learn more about who they are. In exchange, they will be more open to learning more about who you are.
   


4. Link one relationship to another – The power has been and always will be in making the connection for others. Do what you can to link one relationship to another.
   


5. Shorten learning curves – Learn to provide information to someone in need at that very moment that request is made.
   


6. Listen three times as much – When you speak, you learn what you know. When you listen, you learn what they know. Need I say anything more?
   


7. Look & comment about their business card – Quite often people exchange business cards and without even looking at it. Consider looking at it and commenting on something you see on the card. The person in front of you will love the attention.
   


8. Be passionate about your work – Having a passion for the work that you do is contagious. Learn to express yourself as though your life relied on it.
   


9. Find your reason for being – If you're going to go about building relationships with others, it’s important that you self reflect and strengthen the relationship with yourself. Find your reason for being.
   


10. Connect their goals to people you know – Another form of linking relationships to one another. Once you determine what they're looking to accomplish, simply make the connection with others that you know that might be able to move what their wanting to accomplish forward. Think of this as an act of kindness.
    


11. Connect the dots – Connecting the dots is your ability to recall information that helps to clarify one’s intention for moving forward.
    


12. Take the moment and dance with it – Being in the present will always create impact when being with others. Make every effort to be with the person in front of you. Eliminate any possible thoughts going through your mind that is not directly related to the conversation and person your with.
    


13. Follow-up – Know that just being there is not enough. You must have a solid system for creating a persistent presence. This is where most people fall down. They meet people and do nothing with the information. You must follow-up and do so within 48 hours or less. With you being one of the only people following up from the event you recently attended, you’ll surely get their attention for future opportunities.
    

Ron Sukenick
Business Advisor / Relationship Strategist / Author / Connector
rs@ronsukenick.com
www.ronsukenick.com
317-216-8210
Check out my Radio Podcast’s
http://www.smallbizamerica.com/beyond

Let's get connected on LinkedIn
http://www.linkedin.com/pub/ron-sukenick/0/226/20a

“Certified Human Behavior Consultant”
Nominated 2009 "America's Most Influential Business Connector"

For more information, please visit Ron's TNNW Bio.

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BEYOND NETWORKING: BEING: 13 Ways to Create Impact

BEYOND NETWORKING: BEING: The World of Relationships is Like a Kaleidoscope

Beyond Networking: Being with Ron Sukenick

When we fundamentally understand that we have a multitude of considerations that impact how we are in relationship, our view of change and the importance of change is magnified. Consider Ron’s personal view of change.

Let’s take a few minutes and communicate about relationships and change.

When you were a youngster, did you enjoy looking into a Kaleidoscope?

Were you amazed at the infinite varieties of colors and patterns that evolved as it turned in your hand? Did you ever turn it so quickly that you did not have a chance to fully appreciate what you were watching because things were changing so quickly in the little viewer?

The changes in the viewer pale in comparison to the changes experienced in the last decade--and the changes we will experience in the years to come.

There was very little to think about when turning that little Kaleidoscope: just look and enjoy. If you view the world of relationship as a Kaleidoscope, you will see change. Rather than standing there mesmerized or memorizing the colors and patterns as if you can keep things the same, imagine what it might be like to be the colors. For openers, think about every second of your life, every minute, every day, being different from the preceding second, minute, or day. No two interactions or opportunities are the same, just as the patterns in the Kaleidoscope are never the same. Changes are inevitable--in behavior, in life patterns, in your knowledge base, in your habits, and in your relationships. We are not the same person we were even moments ago.

People change. Look around you. Are there new people in your life that were not there a month ago, six months ago, last year? Get to know people around you, and get involved with them. Don’t just observe the changes passively, as if you are looking into a viewer. Be a part of them. Get to know people you come into contact with, what they do, what makes them tick.

Become interested in them and how you can help them. They’ll do the same for you and you’ll enjoy life more.

Technology changes. Are you still using the same equipment as one, two, five years ago? Not very likely. And the equipment you are now using will become obsolete in the near future. Further more, staying abreast of the technological changes and discussing preferred communication tools with your partner is key in developing a collaborative relationship.

Leadership techniques change. When was the last time you picked up and read a management book for insight about new management and leadership practices?

An understanding of the changing needs of today’s workforce (that’s all of us!) will help you be more progressive and able to meet and partner with others within or outside your organization.

Economic factors, urgency, people’s values, technology, and relationship management: all changing everyday, truly a Kaleidoscope. You can become a part of the Kaleidoscope--get inside the viewer--and be the one who determines the next pattern, if you make up your mind to.

Ron Sukenick
Business Advisor / Relationship Strategist / Author / Connector
rs@ronsukenick.com
www.ronsukenick.com
317-216-8210
Check out my Radio Podcast’s
http://www.smallbizamerica.com/beyond

Let's get connected on LinkedIn
http://www.linkedin.com/pub/ron-sukenick/0/226/20a

“Certified Human Behavior Consultant”
Nominated 2009 "America's Most Influential Business Connector"

*Follow TNNW on Twitter at http://twitter.com/TNNW_BUZZWORKS
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BEYOND NETWORKING: BEING: The World of Relationships is Like a Kaleidoscope

UNIVERSAL GUIDE TO NETWORKING - A Meditation on BEing

Universal Guide to Networking with Terry Bean

As a networker, we have to BE a lot of things: professional, credible, responsible, accountable, aware and most importantly, givers. That's a lot of roles to play considering most of us balance this with our day job.

How does one do all this and succeed in their business?

The answer is two-fold. First, the above list contains a lot of characteristics that successful business people possess. In fact, with the exception of "aware" and "givers", that list is like a minimum to do business today. Do your skills match those listed? Do you see improvement areas for you or your colleagues? Life is about continuous improvement. It's never too late to learn.

The second piece is a little deeper. Are you familiar with Landmark Forum? Graduates of their program put together the wonderful movie, "Pay It Forward" (if you haven't seen it, please do. It may change how you network and how you live". While I personally have not experienced the forum, I know a few folks who have. This is not a post about them, but about one of the ideas they share.

Most of us go through life with the belief that states "if I only could have this, I would be able to do X then I would be happy (or whatever we want to be)". The forum suggests that this is backwards thinking. That we in fact need to focus on BEing whatever we are meant (or choose) to BE. And if we are BEing what we are supposed to BE we will do the things we need to do to BE as such. These actions will lead to having what we seek out of life.

Pretty interesting stuff, no? Please share your experience below.

In the meantime I encourage you to BE a better networker and the best business person you can BE.

Be Connected-

Terry Bean

Terry Bean is the founder of www.motorcityconnect.com, Detroit's fastest growing networking group. He is also the founder of www.networkedinc.com- a business development training firm that focuses on helping people make more productive use of their online and offline networking time. Terry provides training and large scale presentations on networking, social media usage and universal laws. Hot off the press, Terry just released his first CD entitled "The Five U's of Networking" e-mail tbean@networkedinc.com to reserve your copy.

For more details, please visit Terry's TNNW Bio.

Published by THE NATIONAL NETWORKER Newsletter. All rights reserved. Subscribe Free - Click HERE.
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UNIVERSAL GUIDE TO NETWORKING - A Meditation on BEing

BEYOND NETWORKING: BEING: Moving Into Legendary Status: Going From the Ordinary to the Extraordinary

Beyond Networking: Being with Ron Sukenick

Ron's section is sponsored by SmallBizAmerica.com

A consistent focus in moving from the ordinary to the extraordinary moves us to legendary status. Rethinking what we do, looking for ways to become more resourceful, and having a process and project management focus will help establish this exceptional foundation. Going from the ordinary to the extraordinary calls for a continual self reflection of how you are performing in relationship. Self reflection provides information to help you improve your efforts and move toward extraordinary relationship satisfaction.
Here is a simple process to help you reflect back.

From Ordinary to Extraordinary

Imagine looking at your life through a movie projector. Slow the projector down and stop on those moments that were exceptional. Focus in on one and then answer the following:
1. Describe the experience.
2. What was it about the experience that separated it from all the rest?
3. What made it so extraordinary?
4. How did it feel?
Perhaps you focused your mind’s eye on a holiday, a trip to the beach, a successful project, your honeymoon, the first day on a new job, or your first kiss. Whatever it was, the experience came with an extraordinary feeling, and probably came in relationship with at least one other person. How can you help your partners achieve this feeling? Ask good questions! Ask what makes the difference between good or great for your partner. By asking good questions and purposeful listening, you’ll gain insight from verbal and nonverbal cues, and information derived from reading between the lines.

A Project Management Focus
A project begins in relationship with at least one other person, or one element of your environment. There are many considerations as you examine all the elements toward the extraordinary completion of a project


What is the vision that both of you have for the project? What resources do you need to move your project, and therefore your relationship, toward legendary status?
Project management is a matter of identifying all the important factors, and then creating a system to move your project and your relationship forward. A project management focus provides a framework and makes it possible to move from the ordinary to the extraordinary.

Ron Sukenick is the Chief Relationship Officer and founder of the Relationship Strategies Institute, a training and Relationship development company that provides innovative, effective and relevant programs and systems for corporations, organizations, and associations. To learn more about the value of Relationship Development, visit his Web site at http://www.ronsukenick.com/. You can reach Ron by phone at: 317-216-8210, or by email: rs@ronsukenick.com
Posted to THE NATIONAL NETWORKER.

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BEYOND NETWORKING: BEING: Moving Into Legendary Status: Going From the Ordinary to the Extraordinary

BEYOND NETWORKING: BEING: Strategy Ten

Beyond Networking: Being with Ron Sukenick

Ron's section is sponsored by SmallBizAmerica.com

Strategy Ten
Shorten Learning Curves: Move Into Dream Fulfillment

As you might guess, from reading my column over the years, my book project with Jane surges has provided numerous opportunities for Jane and me to apply each of these strategies to our partnership. This strategy, shortening learning curves, has proven to be a particular catalyst to fuel us forward.

We realized over lunch after a racquetball game that we both were passionate about relationships and relationship success. My writings about networking and my passion about another level beyond what is happening in the mainstream complemented well with Jane’s writings and passion around helping people hold a relationship vision that opens the possibility of co-creation and partnership. Within 30 minutes, we identified an overlapping purpose and this book partnership was launched. Within a short eight months, it was finished. How do two people who do not know each other very well come together and join forces toward this kind of project or any other? We would like to say, from our experience—not just this one but many others, it is through shortening the learning curve. Following are two graphics. One illustrates a long learning curve where side roads are taken as individuals lose track of the project vision.

This is contrasted to a shortened learning curve that focuses on finding common ground. When we focus on common ground and what is most important in a given moment, we keep the bigger picture of our purpose and intentions before us. We work straight ahead—using direct communication and staying mindful of the context. Trusting that the other has our best interest in mind, we move ahead at a pace fueled with positive energy. See if you can picture this for yourself.

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Long Learning Curve:

Short Learning Curve:

To help shorten the learning curve, there may be issues you are facing. Following are questions for your consideration. Think about one of your personal or business partners. Respond to the following questions:

What project emerged between the two of you?
What problems, issues, needs or opportunities can the two of you respond to and address together?
What resources, information, time frame will support your project?
Who will be impacted by this project, and how will they be affected? How might they be involved in the project?
How will you know if you are individually and jointly successful?
What adjustments need to be made as you move forward toward project completion (dream fulfillment)?
How do your channels of communication support your project and shorten the learning curve? (i.e. email, voice mail, direct communication, talking about prior experiences or learning curves.)
Are you looking out for each other as well as your joint interests throughout this process? If not, what improvements need to be made?
What challenges are you currently facing (financial, communication, resources, etc.?)


What steps taken together would move you more expediently and more closely to project completion?

Scenario Planning

There are times for extensive market studies and long term plans. During those times, by all means incorporate a longer approach to moving toward a joint collaborative effort.

Scenario planning will help you move much more quickly and may be just what you need for the joint project at hand. Write a brief case study with the objective and with as many variables that you can think of. Balance your optimistic thoughts with opposite possibilities to make sure that you are encompassing all possible contingencies. Include as much of the “unpredictable” as possible—again include what can go right, and what can go wrong. Then discuss the scenario and how you might deal with challenges that might arise.


What action steps will you take? Add these steps to your calendar right now.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

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BEYOND NETWORKING: BEING: Strategy Ten

The ROI of Relationships

Beyond Networking: Being with Ron Sukenick

It's interesting what happens sometimes when I'm talking to a group about networking and about setting in place a system for building relationships with other people. Someone in the audience will approach me after the talk, or perhaps send me an email, explaining that, while they "get" my message, they simply don't have time in their schedule for deeper relationships in business. They have to keep up their sales quotas, they say, and work on their proposals and projects, handle oceans of email, meet with their accountants, and do whatever else it is they have to do. So, when they attend a networking event, their goal is to gain exposure to as many different businesspeople as possible, and then, quickly as they can, figure out the one or two people that are in a position to do business with them now. They like the idea of "speed networking", and the speedier, the better as far as they're concerned. Long-term interactions with businesspeople with whom they can form a relationship, they're afraid, constitute a luxury they can ill afford.

Sometimes those same people talk to me about the problems in our economy. In addition to all their normal business challenges, they complain, they have to keep moving quickly (even if that means having shallower relationships, some add) if they're to survive the credit crunch, downsizing, and everything else going on.

When I hear statements such as these from members of my audience, I don't get defensive or angry. As many years as I've devoted to teaching and coaching about networking, it took me years to realize and accept the simple fact that we can help and be helped only when we invest the time to know more about other business people on a deeper level. I use that word "invest" on purpose, because that's exactly what it is, an investment. We make that investment of time and effort and purposeful listening and helping for a reason. Just as with any financial investment or real estate investment, we do it in order to increase our ROI, our return on investment.

When people finally do "get my message", they realize that taking time to interact at least six times from the time they first meet a new business contact isn't detracting

from their business, it is what will build their business! Make no mistake - going beyond just attending networking meetings to creating connections and cultivating relationships is not only personally rewarding - it's very, very good business!

________________________________________________________

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The ROI of Relationships

Strategy Six - Consistently Doing the Little Things: Make The Big Difference

Beyond Networking: Being with Ron Sukenick

"Life is made up of little things. True greatness consists in being great in little things". - Charles Simmons


When I was still in corporate life, there was a time when I was quite overwhelmed by the time and attention needed by the hundreds of people with whom I worked. I was having a very difficult time in my desire to respond to the multitude of competing needs by the organization and by employees hungry for coaching, development, continuous improvement, support and resources. A good friend told me a story he thought would help me in my struggle, and this small act made a big difference to me. He told me about a man walking along a beach at one of the world’s great oceans and seeing thousands of starfish, as far as he could see, washed up along the shore. He spotted one lone man as he got closer, throwing the starfish one by one back into the ocean. As he approached the man, he said “what possible difference can you make. You’ll never be able to throw all these starfish out into the sea. Why try?” The man smiled compassionately while still throwing the starfish out, and replied gently, “I just made a difference to that one.”

What I’ve grown to realize and accept over the years is this one simple fact. The more we know about people, the more likely we can help. But the real question is this: What does it take to know people? How about this for an answer: What I’ve learned from years of interaction and observation, is that it takes approximately 2000 hours to get to know anyone. To put this into perspective, let me illustrate it this way. Working 40 hours a week for 50 weeks, would be 2000 hours. Now the question, how likely is it that you will be able to devote 2000 hours in any given year to getting to know someone? In my opinion it is not likely, but should this be a goal of ours? In my world, while the number of 2000 certainly reflects one’s commitment to building the relationship, and I suggest that you start on this road, it’s also important that each and every one of us take the time to pause, and to pace ourselves on how we build our relationships.

How true it is when it comes to building solid relationships with others. Take a moment and think about rolling a pair of dice. If we asked you to roll one of the dice it would be called a die.

As you know, most die are numbered from 1 to 6 right? OK, now here’s the question.

If you roll the die 20 times in a row, and the die lands on the number 3, what are the odds that the next time you roll the die it will land on the number 3? Now don’t rush into it. Think for a moment.

Now most people that I mention this to say one of two things:

The odds are not very likely
OR
The odds are very likely

The reality is that in both cases the odds are the same. They are one in six.

With that said, what’s most interesting about this formula, is the magic number of 6.

Now, let us contrast rolling dice to increasing interaction. Increasing interaction brings increased cooperation with others.

From my own observations, and from self research, my theory is that if you can interact with someone at least six times, then you’ll end up having a 50/50 chance of either building an incredible relationship or not having a relationship at all.

While I’m open to having a relationship with others, it’s only through mutual consideration that a relationship is possible. If you consider that the interaction you had could lead into an incredible relationship with someone then it is so. It’s that simple.

So what is it I’m saying you ask? I’m saying that if you are interested in pursuing a relationship with another, make the attempt to interact at least six times from the time you first meet them.

By doing this, you’re in a position to continue to the lay the foundation toward building a wonderful relationship with another.

When all is said and done, just being there is never enough. Follow-up, increased interaction, and a sincere approach to the relationship is a winning combination.

Here’s a Fun NetBeing Exercise

As you’re getting ready to leave the next networking event you attend, consider doing this. Make a concerted effort to make one last round for the sole purpose of saying goodbye to others, particularly saying goodbye to those whom you have met for the first time. You'll be amazed at how an additional 10-15 minutes of your time will affect others and how much your effort will be appreciated. It's a small but powerful way to develop relationships with new contacts. It is the little thing that makes a big difference.



How to Interact Six Times

Here’s a simple method to the madness in building six interactions into your relationships.

1.
You meet someone for the first time.
2.
You send an e-mail stating that you enjoyed the interaction and look forward to seeing them again in the future.
3.
If you have something in common, and you think that a project can be initiated or a partnership can be put in place, suggest that you get together.
4.
Get together with the person.
5.
After you’ve been together, thank them for taking the time to meet with you.
6.
Stay in touch.

Thinking Points for Connecting Forward

Ask people, what “one thing” would help them right now move their personal or professional life forward. Help them by providing resources, or connecting them with others to make it possible.



Summary
This strategy has emphasized the power of small acts and how through consistently doing the little things, we make a big difference in the lives of countless others—and who knows, perhaps the world!

Next month we will move on to creating visibility, Strategy Seven, which focuses on multiplying efforts of exposing yourself to new and exciting possibilities and meeting and deepening relationships.


This strategy as you might have previously read emphasizes the power of small acts and how through consistently doing the little things, we make a big difference in the lives of countless others—and who knows, perhaps the world!

We are always in relationship to our environment. Our environment includes our families, our friends, our neighbors, our community, our business colleagues, a spiritual force, and nature itself.

What are the little things that we do that are relational? If we are hiking in a park, perhaps we pick up litter along the trail. Understanding that we are always in relationship with some one or some aspect of our environment, helps keep us mindful of NetBeing as a way of life.

Following are relationship actions that, while not being inclusive, support consistently doing the little things.

Spontaneity
Attentiveness
Listening
Connecting people with complementary needs
Graciousness
Touching base
Mentoring

How can you use some of the actions above to help support you in doing the little things that make a big difference.
What action steps will you take? Add these steps to your calendar right now.

___________________________________________________________________

Ron Sukenick is the Chief Relationship Officer and founder of the Relationship Strategies Institute, a training and Relationship development company that provides innovative, effective and relevant programs and systems for corporations, organizations, and associations. To learn more about the value of Relationship Development, visit his Web site at http://www.ronsukenick.com/ . You can reach Ron by phone at: 317-216-8210, or by email.

___________________________________________________________________

Posted to THE NATIONAL NETWORKER. To subscribe for your free newletter, go to http://www.thenationalnetworker.com/. For the complete National Networker Relationship Capital Toolkit and a free RSS feed, go to: http://thenationalnetworkerweblog.blogspot.com/.

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Strategy Six - Consistently Doing the Little Things: Make The Big Difference

The First Impression Factor, Part VII

JetNetting with Heshie Segal

Tips on how to make a positive first impression and an opportunity for self-assessment:

As you read through the lists below rate yourself as you believe others would rate you. Be brutally honest, since personal acknowledgment is the first step to development and growth.

At the end of each segment total your scores and see how you stack up. Thereafter, immediately create an action plan for your self-development.

Become as much as you can be and positive first impressions will become your hallmark and your success.

About Communication 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Be attentive o o o o o o o o o o

Make people feel heard o o o o o o o o o o

Ask intelligent questions o o o o o o o o o o

Ask questions and listen to the answers o o o o o o o o o o

Be an active listener. o o o o o o o o o o

Make restatements – to ensure your understanding o o o o o o o o o o

Seek to understand o o o o o o o o o o

Be empathetic and show your caring o o o o o o o o o o

Be encouraging o o o o o o o o o o

Make and sustain appropriate eye contact o o o o o o o o o o

Be fully engaged o o o o o o o o o o

Be flexible o o o o o o o o o o

Smile o o o o o o o o o o

Be a self-starter o o o o o o o o o o

Be supportive o o o o o o o o o o

Use positive body language o o o o o o o o o o

Be in control of your own communication o o o o o o o o o o

Be reassuring o o o o o o o o o o

Be receptive to the ideas of others o o o o o o o o o o

Be tactful/diplomatic o o o o o o o o o o

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Scores (add each column and multiply it by it’s value

then add all scores together to get a total)

Total Score ___________

About Being 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Be likable o o o o o o o o o o

Be authentic/open/honest/genuine o o o o o o o o o o

Be yourself o o o o o o o o o o

Be accommodating/helpful/cooperative o o o o o o o o o o

Be appreciative and show it o o o o o o o o o o

Be proactive o o o o o o o o o o

Be a problem solver o o o o o o o o o o

Be respectful o o o o o o o o o o

Be confident o o o o o o o o o o

Be consistent o o o o o o o o o o

Be creative/imaginative o o o o o o o o o o

Be curious o o o o o o o o o o

Be courteous/polite/gracious o o o o o o o o o o

Be dynamic/energizing o o o o o o o o o o

Be memorable o o o o o o o o o o

Be friendly/pleasant o o o o o o o o o o

Be welcoming of others o o o o o o o o o o

Be interested vs. interesting o o o o o o o o o o

Let your optimism be evident o o o o o o o o o o

Be decisive o o o o o o o o o o

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Scores (add each column and multiply it by it’s value

then add all scores together to get a total)

Total Score ___________

About Being Your Word 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Do what you say you will do o o o o o o o o o o

Be dependable o o o o o o o o o o

Only make promises you will keep o o o o o o o o o o

Be on time o o o o o o o o o o

__ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __

Scores (add each column and multiply it by it’s value,

then add all scores together to get a total)

Total Score ___________

What do the scores mean?

About Communication

160 – 200 You are clearly a good communicator, externally focused and make a very positive first impression

120 – 159 Keep up the good work, focus on your lowest scores and your first impressions quotient will rise rewardingly

80 – 119 You are in the development stage and might benefit from a communication skills course

40 – 79 Acknowledge yourself for your honesty. You will want to take a very serious look at your weakness and diligently work on growth and improvement. Seek help.

10 – 39 This is an unusually low score and suggests significant trauma that has delayed your communication skills development. You will want to take a very serious look at your weakness and diligently work on growth and improvement. Seek help

About Being

160 – 200 You are clearly comfortable with yourself, congruent in your being and action, and make a very strong and positive first impression

120 – 159 Keep up the good work, focus on your lowest scores, your comfort with self will escalate and your first impression impact will rise rewardingly

80 – 119 You are in the development stage and might benefit from a self development course

40 – 79 Acknowledge yourself for your honesty. You will want to take a very serious look at your weaknesses and diligently work on personal grounding, confidence and comfort. Some great courses and workshops exist that can help you along the way.

10 – 39 This is an unusually low score and suggests significant delayed your personal development (unless it is age related). You will want to take a very serious look at your weakness and diligently work on grounding, self-confidence, growth and improvement. Seek help. Some great courses and workshops exist that can help you along the way.

About being Your Word

36 – 40 You are the pillar of society. This is the first step to make relationships blossom

30 –35 Step yourself up a notch. We either have integrity or we don’t. There is no half way. Go the extra mile

20- 29 You need to decide whether relationships have any value to you. This level score points to a lack of integrity, without which relationships become hard to sustain.

4 – 19 You need to take a long hard look in the mirror and decide what win/win solutions really mean. The implications are you are self-absorbed and have an opportunity to a significantly enhance your relationships (and likely your life) with some effort; if you so choose.

In the next issues in the First Impression Series, I will help you build on the above to make sure the first impression you make becomes a lasting one.

________________________________________________________

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The First Impression Factor, Part VII