The Stress of Success with Cinda Hocking, LMSWWe can easily tell people what we stand against. Listen to most people and their day is a litany of what went wrong – what they don’t like, don’t want, and don’t wish to experience. However, when it comes to turning the focus to what we stand for, we are usually far less prolific or articulate.
Watch your behavior for a day. How many times are your thoughts, words and actions focused on what is wrong, unsatisfactory, insufficient, disappointing, frustrating and ignorant both in others and within yourself? How many times a day are your thoughts words and actions about what is right, valuable, positive and true in others and in yourself? How many times are you looking backwards in regret or forward in fear at what was not or is not working instead of supporting and improving what is what is working and creating improved or new solutions?
Of course it is not helpful to deny or hide from the truth that there are serious challenges facing our world on all levels - from global issues to community crises to individual stressors. However, when the focus is only on the darkness, how can you bring light to the situation? Does staying overwhelmed by the admittedly daunting horror and sadness help create solutions to them? Or, do we need to find a way to keep moving forward?
By simply aligning with and being true to your own essence, showing what it is you stand for you start becoming an example of how to be a beacon in the darkness. Those flashes of light help inspire others to rise to their potential instead of fall into despair. We don’t need more Polly Annas or Chicken Littles. Denying and ignoring the dark side is just as foolish as indulging and succumbing to the dark side, and neither extreme helps us learn to live with more compassion.
There is a wealth of barely explored options and uncharted possibilities and human potential waiting to be developed. Yes, it is far more difficult to stay focused on solution building than it is to list what is wrong with the world. But, making things work better is infinitely more rewarding than complaining – but it takes work! When you are tempted to fall into the traps of depressive cynicism or deny the reality of suffering, balance yourself by realizing that unconscious conditioned reactions cause lots of problems in all areas of life, but we humans also have innate creativity and abilities to train ourselves to live a more balanced and harmonious life. Complaining is easy, pretending everything is fine is a bit harder, but the hardest and most rewarding work is to take charge and direct our lives consciously. Do one thing to show what you stand for. Starting Right Here Right Now.
Cinda Hocking, LMSW
Health and Wellness Lifestyle Counselor
For more information, please visit Cinda's TNNW Bio.
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