TNNW UPDATE! December, 2009, Week 2 - Read These, Or Our Feelings Will Be Hurt. - Here at TNNW, we have learned to use guilt as a tool to manipulate our readers to our advantage. It worked for our mothers, and it can work for us!

December, 2009, WEEK 2 - We Want Your BackTalk.

SUPERCHARGED NETWORKING : TURNING CONTACTS INTO BUSINESS. CONVERTING IDEAS INTO PRODUCTS.

Synthesizing;
Synergizing;
Mobilizing; and
Monetizing.

It's what we do. And we do it for you.

UPDATE ISSUE # 22

We have a stunning NEW FEATURE in this Letter...THE SPIN ZONE. Keep reading and you'll get to it. We swear.

Get your free subscription to the TNNW Weekly Newsletter at our new subscription address:

http://twitlik.com/IN Yes indeed, you can now subscribe at http://twitlik.com/IN (Note: this is a fresh, new, virginal subscription address)

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THE NATIONAL NETWORKER COMPANIES...WHO WE ARE AND WHAT WE DO:

The NATIONAL NETWORKER Newsletter is actually the gateway to THE NATIONAL NETWORKER COMPANIES, and their services. TNNW is, and will continue to be our flagship publication, and it will continue to be free. For everyone's edification (and to address a wonderfully direct question from Featured Columnist Beth Barany) here's the the picture, in brief:

We are going to be changing our company name to THE NATIONAL NETWORKER COMPANIES LLC. This "umbrella company" will be the parent company to a number of Divisions, each of which will provide its own group of services. In general terms, THE NATIONAL NETWORKER COMPANIES LLC, (the "Holding Company") as an entity, will be in three businesses through its Divisions. And now...

Take a look at our Divisional Logos, and what goodies will be available to you under each. In our next Update!, we will give you the specific services (and page coordinates) for every single service category. Then, you'll be using us more than any plumbing appliance. Also, note that we will be servicing and supporting everything thing that we provide. It's not a "sale"....its the beginning of a partnership with every one of our clients.

Publishing and providing business news, information, research and intelligence for the benefit of its members through newsletters, news feeds, special bulletins, surveys, announcements, news releases, webinars, forums videos and events. The news, information, research and intelligence will be focused on all aspects of becoming successful personally and professionally -- in your life and in your career. Our membership is comprised of executives, entrepreneurs and professionals. They are united in their desire to achieve greater success, and in their desire to network, connect, collaborate and to become part of a greater community for the sharing of resources, and ultimately, for sharing in the profits of the world's first Global Interworked Cooperative Business Community (GICBC), which the Founders of the Holding Company believe will be the next form of business entity. Membership is free and is automatically granted with subscription to The TNNW Newsletter, and services are only provided to members. Ultimately, the Holding Company will be member-owned, with members becoming contributors and stakeholders in an internationally-diversified company. We promote authorship and a synergistic masterminding of ideas. We are changing ideas and energy into plans, progress, products and profits for our members and with our members.

Providing a suite of unique, innovative and powerful services for the benefit of all members. These services will not be available to the general public-at-large, and will include: PUBLICITY, NEWS RELEASES, MARKET RESEARCH, SURVEYS, CALENDAR POSTING, INTERNATIONAL AGENT/ DISTRIBUTOR and REPRESENTATION SERVICES, PUBLISHING, RISK MANAGEMENT SERVICES and FINANCING SERVICES.

Providing social media domination, image-building, branding and other buzz-related services through our own, internally-built Buzzworks Team. We have the ability to popularize individuals, ideas, products, publications for the benefit of our members. Buzzworks does its magic for members in connection with the services offered through the other Divisions. Our Principal Product has the unlikely name of "BRUTE FORCE REQUEST". We're not kidding.

And that, Ladies and Gentlemen, is who we are and what we do. We are privately owned, but we will be a ground-breaking GICBC (you can Google it... it is an acronym for "Global Interworked Cooperative Business Community") before you know it.

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PROGRESS -

We are integrating our websites, blogsites and services to make them more user-friendly, more user-interactive and easier to navigate than ever before. We are finalizing the terms of affiliation with several other service-providers and international cause-centered organizations, including a Not-For-Profit [IRS Section 501(c)3] Foundation. Expect event announcements, fundraisers, contests, and real-time, real-space interaction.

PROGRAMS and PRODUCTS -
Just watch.

During the course of the most recent 12-month period, our subscribership has grown by more than 24%, and it is growing at an accelerating pace. This past November 1st, all Subscribers automatically became Members. All Members of record (as of that date) will be receiving special benefits, and will be thumbing their noses at you late-joiners in early 2010.

In the coming year will be more highly-focused on corroborative Member projects, personalized connecting, and edgy (which rhymes with "wedgie," but we would not say that) articles from some of our new Featured Columnists.

We will be promoting our our TNNWC (the National Networker Companies) suite of services very aggressively to our growing Membership while constantly incorporating your indispensible feedback in the ever-evolving process of improving each of them.

COMMUNITY -

We are not just a group of publications. We are not just a services provider. We are a community, and it is our pledge to use this potentialized, exponentialized critical-mass Supermind to aggressively and proactively assist every Member in attaining his or her goals for self-growth and professional, financial success.

NEW COMMENT BUTTON -

Many of our highly-opinionated and inordinately vociferous readers have been complaining that they would like a "comment" button embedded right in each article posting so that they could just click on it with their views, questions, ideas, suggestions, criticisms and rhubarb pie recipes (one elderly woman from Minnesota actually did want to send us recipes). Your wish has been granted...the following button will now be embedded in every article so that you may click, instantly access a pop-up form, and engage in an excoriating diatribe, a passionate rant, a productive suggestion, or a compliment to one of our talented but deeply tormented writers (think of Edgar Allen Poe, Sylvia Plath, or Ernest Hemingway).

Would you just look at this button? Think of how easy it will now be to give us your BackTalk.

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THE SPIN ZONE - EXPLOSIVE NEWS
NOTE: This is not a Featured Column in THE NATIONAL NETWORKER Newsletter. It was an article deemed unfit for publication by the editorial authorities at that august and unempeachably respectable publication. The views expressed in this article by its author, Douglas Castle, do not necessarily reflect those of TNNW Management. Further, the views expressed by Mr. Castle in this "article" (using this latter term loosely), should not be construed by the reader as health, medical, legal, financial, tax or other professional or authoritative advice of any sort, even by the lowest standards. The reader should not rely on this article for any purposes whatsoever. The reader of this article reads the article (which is actually redundant as well as self-evident) at his or her own risk, and the publisher (and its employees, officers, directors, affiliaties, subsidiaries, agents, assigns, next-of-kin, concubines, janitorial staff, janitorial staph, casual acquaintances, etcetera, etcetera) assumes no liability, responsibility, or blame. There - that about covers it. (Phew)

Incidentally, you can join THE NATIONAL NETWORKER and obtain your free subscription to its Newsletter and the BLUE TUESDAY Report by clicking on http://twitlik.com/IN .

Dear Readers:

The brief article which follows appeared in the NEW YORK POST moments ago. To some, it would appear to be bad news for UNILEVER, the manufacturer of the popular SLIM-FAST drink. I see this as a perfect example of how putting the right spin on a news item can change everything. Their announcement follows. My revised version appears after the actual version. Remember -- publicity requires a great deal of creativity and is not recommended for the non-professional. It would be very unprofessional and unethical if I were to point out that you should be using TNNW's News Release Services (COMING SOON!) to utilize the media to your best possible advantage in a public relations or publicity campaign, and so I will not do that.

Faithfully,

Douglas Castle
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Diarrhea-Fast

Last Updated: 6:21 AM, December 5, 2009
Posted: 4:42 AM, December 5, 2009

Unilever announced yesterday it voluntarily recalling all its Slim-Fast drinks due to a possible bacterial contamination.

The company said in a statement the diet products may be contaminated with Bacillus cereus, a micro-organism that can cause diarrhea, nausea and vomiting, but the chance of serious health problems was "remote."

The recall involves all Slim-Fast RTD products in cans.
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My revision of the article:

Slim-Fast: Faster Than Ever

Last Updated: 6:21 AM, December 5, 2009
Posted: 4:42 AM, December 5, 2009

Unilever announced yesterday a tremendous breakthrough and enhancement in its very popular line of Slim-Fast drinks.

For a few lucky consumers of the time-honored weight-reduction product (perhaps one in every 1,000, chosen at random), their purchases will contain a new, scientifically-proven, environmentally-friendly, colon-cleansing, enhancement! This incredible accelerant is actually a simple bacillus which increases the efficiency of the entire gastro-intestinal tract, greatly speeding up the weight-loss process without the use of dangerous appetite suppressants or drugs. The company is in the process of patenting this special bacillus, a spokesperson said.

The company said in a statement that through its aggressive test-marketing campaign, code-named "Operation Bazooka," certain randomized cans of the products, already on shelves at many stores, have been enhanced with Bacillus cereus, the eco-friendly micro-organism that many are heralding as "one of Mother Nature's best laxatives ever!" Some lucky consumers will likely be very, very surprised.

The company's vice president of new product development said he expects Unilever's share of the weight-loss drink market to increase exponentially as consumers get word of the explosive development.

Rumors that Unilever is also about to unveil new lines of adult diapers, bathroom deodorizers, antiemetics and a product which would compete head-to-head with Preparation H, were unconfirmed.
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With our Commitment of Great Things to Come,

Adam J. Kovitz and Douglas Castle
For THE NATIONAL NETWORKER COMPANIES

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Posted to THE NATIONAL NETWORKER (TNNW). All rights reserved.

To subscribe for your free TNNW Newsletter, go to http://www.thenationalnetworker.com/ For the complete National Networker (TNNW) Relationship Capital Toolkit and a free continuous RSS feed (available either by traditional RSS or by direct email), go to: http://thenationalnetworkerweblog.blogspot.com/

Pick your news? Sure. Everyone should.