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Tuesday, January 04, 2011

BLUE THING #10: Lingovation of the Week

Dear Friends:

As you may or may not know, a Lingovation is a newly-created, freshly-coined word, often comprised of a hybrid or contraction of several existing words, which comes into being when no other single existing word or word combination (and sometimes not even an entire paragraph!) can precisely express the thought. They are not nonsensical terms, and must indeed be taken very seriously.

SPACKLEMEISTERS – A derogatory term (a lingovated noun) used to describe the spokespersons, staffers and interns (as well as the occasional grandstanding defense attorney) working for either a major political or major business figure who is being “roasted” in the media, the courtroom, or by any group of persons with serious questions about his or her ideas, plans, policies, ethics or hidden agenda.

These spokespersons, staffers and interns are supposed to be involved in media relations and swaying public opinion (in the 1990’s, the popular generic descriptive terms were either “fixers” or “spin doctors”) in favor of their respective employers, but without having either an intelligent explanation or a valid defense they resort to cliches, obvious lies, or misdirection:

Some typical spacklemeister lines follow:

“My client is absolutely innocent of all of these allegations, and will be vindicated at the conclusion of this (insert: investigation, trial, or hearing).”

“These accusations are politically motivated, and without any merit or validity whatsoever. My client is innocent and we will launch a vigorous defense so that that he/ she can get back to serving (insert: his constituents, the State, the Country, the People, pizzas and calzones).”

“He/ She knew nothing about this unauthorized activity, and is determined to launch a thorough internal investigation into this serious matter. This is certainly not in keeping with the (insert: company’s, agency’s, department’s, etc.) rules of conduct. The party or parties responsible will be identified and dealt with (i.e., used as scapegoats and thrown under the bus).

“It’s protected by executive privilege.”

“It is a matter of national security and the records relating to it will not be divulged.”

“He/ She can make no comment at this time as this is an open (insert: investigation, case, manhole, etcetera).

p.s. If after reading the LINGOVATION above, you have some idea of your very own for a new LINGOVATION, simply press on the button which follows (it says "Submit My Original Lingovation") to submit your new word and its definition, and we will make you famous...well, perhaps just somewhat famous. We will get your Lingovation a very high ranking on all of the search engines -- that much is assured!

The button.....


Labels, Tags and Keywords : Blue Things, Blue Tuesday, Lingovation of the Week, the national networker, TNNW, tnnwc, Omnigadget, wordplay, Technullity

A brief word from our Sponsor, Albert Einstein, who is deceased at the moment, having suffered (apparently) at least one too many electroconvulsive therapy treatments:

We, at TNNWC Group have also received high praise from none other than... presidential hopeful Sarah "Mama Grizzly" Palin! Who knows where our next celebrity endorsement (or next meal, for that matter) will be coming from? Perhaps Michael Vick? Perhaps Paris Hilton??? Lingovations -- we were nothing before they came into existence.


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