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Wednesday, July 21, 2010

KALÖN WOMEN: Smart Women Deal With Their “Stuff”

Guest Columnist Joy Chudacoff

Today, I received an email from a very smart woman who is just beginning her journey as an entrepreneur. In her email, she shared with me that lately she’s been noticing that a lot of “stuff” is coming up for her. When I read this, I smiled. I knew that my smart, courageous friend is getting out of her “comfort zone.” Smart Women know that when they enter unfamiliar territory in life and business, “stuff” always shows up and can get in the way.

Making a decision to do something new or different in your life can get really uncomfortable. It triggers all of your “stuff” down deep inside. You may start to question everything you do and sometimes you wonder if you should continue with your new Big Idea, Dream, or Goal. After all, you may not be overjoyed with your current life situation, job, or business but at least it’s familiar—right? I remember a time in my life when I felt out of sorts, stuck and trapped, but at the same time I wasn’t sure if I had the courage to make the changes that were needed in order to feel whole, passionate and purposeful.

For example, when I decided to give birth to Smart Women Smart Solutions, there were many reasons why it wasn’t the most “ideal” time to begin something new. For example, I had my son who was a toddler and was pregnant with my daughter. My “stuff” seemed to pop up everywhere and follow me around with all of the reasons why now might not be the “right” time to start a new business. “Who will take care of my son?” “Now isn’t the right time” “What if it doesn’t work?” “What if I fail?” Sound familiar?

I have fears just like everyone else. Confronting your “stuff” is not much fun. It means you have to take a look at what is and decide if you have the courage to change and do what it takes to breakthrough to the next level in your life.

Over the last 2 decades, I’ve had times where I was surviving and times where I was thriving, and I will share with you that in order to “thrive”, sometimes you have to go through that “survive” period. It’s essential that you learn about yourself and see what changes or shifts you need to make in order to realize your Big Ideas, Dreams, and Goals. My grandfather used to say, “Joy, no matter where you go, there you are.” Well said Pops. Sometimes, we get in our own way and practice the art of self-sabotage without really even realizing it.

Here are a few solutions that have helped me with my “stuff” and I believe it can help you too:

1. Look for a “Thinking” Partner – Have someone on your side. Someone who can support you in a positive way when your “stuff” comes up. Having a “thinking” partner will help you to see how to move past your “stuff” and stay on the right course to accomplish your goals.

2. Find Successful Role Models – It’s essential to find people who’ve been successful and continue to be growth-oriented. One of the biggest mistakes I see people make as entrepreneurs is they stay in a vacuum. They try to figure out how to accomplish their dreams on their own. Let successful people show you the way. They have paved a road that will be much easier for you to follow. Attend conferences, join Mastermind groups, or hire a Coach to help you stay the course.

3. Make sure your Desire is Heartfelt – When the desire is there, the how-to will come. No matter how much “stuff” you are dealing with around this change you are making in your life, desire will always win, if it’s authentic and truly what you want in life. Get really clear and focused on what you want to happen.

Living a life that allows you to achieve and have what you want and deserve is not always easy but it’s certainly worth the effort. Facing your “stuff” along the way not only helps you, but it helps all of the people who come in contact with you now and in the future. You will become a beacon of light that they can look to for guidance when they confront their “stuff.” Remember, it’s not trespassing if you cross your own boundaries.

Joy Chudacoff
, ICF, PCC, is the founder of Smart Women Smart Solutions(tm), a Professional Certified Coach to 1000’s of women, Motivational Speaker, and Entrepreneur. She publishes a weekly buzz generating ezine, Reflections On Life and Business for Women Entrepreneurs. If you’re ready take your coaching business to the next level, get your FREE Tips, FREE Report, FREE MP3 and be the first to hear about my exciting new program for coaches and consultants at

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